Follow Your Arts

by Sarah Eckstine

Symptomatic records ongoing procedures toward being diagnosed with and treating Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (POTS), an autonomic nervous system disorder. This series documents my body’s most current state through photographs taken immediately after a procedure or doctor’s visit. These traditional self-portraits are
accompanied by medical imagery extracted from CT scans and contact prints of diagnostic devices. These pieces join together internal and external, literal and representational self-portraits.

Working with analog photography and in the darkroom, I’ve found myself drawn to methods that mimic how it feels to undergo the procedures depicted in the works. Placing electrodes on my torso and wrapping the shuer release cable around my body mirrors my experience being intertwined with wires connected to ECG pads. The techniques of both a scan and making a photogram involve the subject having to lie perfectly still for an extended period of time while different mechanisms work to capture images. I find there to be similarities in how light passes through a negative to make an imprint on paper and how the X-rays of a CT scan permeate the brain.

This form of creating allows me to have control in the process of making images of myself and provides visual confirmation of what is happening inside my body. Re-documenting myself through existing medical scans and worn objects, turning a darkroom into my own laboratory, is emotionally cathartic and helps me stay connected with my body after feeling like a specimen during many tests and treatments.